Maybe you already have many of the skills of a confident person, but if you are looking to become UNSHAKABLY CONFIDENT, here are the tips that Ouss Zoglami and his team have for you. True confidence fails many times but never fades away, meaning that your confidence should never depend on the outside world. Your confidence should be intrinsic, not extrinsic. Whatever happens outside, you need to keep growing your inner confidence. If your confidence keeps failing because of external events, it only means that you are not truly confident. In other words, your confidence will be “shakable”. In order to develop UNSHAKABLE confidence, Ouss Zoglami uses the following steps.
Our strengths and motivations are useful when we know them. If we don’t know them well, they can become weaknesses
Find your strengths. Write them down if you have to. When have you felt proud, fulfilled, happy and confident? What motivates you to become confident? What frustrates you about not being confident in certain areas? What are your fears when trying to be confident? The first step to true confidence is to understand who you are and get to know your own resources and strengths. As soon as you clearly know your strengths and motivations, you can use them to build your confidence.
Remember that your past does not define you. You define yourself. Throughout human history, many people have endured harsh lives filled with poverty, abuse, hatred, ignorance and rejection, and used their experiences as a resource. The past is a gift, and it is up to you to view it as such.
Many people want to become confident but have no clue what confidence looks like.
When you imagine a confident person, what do you see? Who is your model? What are the qualities that this person has that you lack? Finding a role model is a crucial step, because we have all grown up modelling our parents . Modelling and mirroring are tools we developed early on in order to survive. You need to use those natural skills to find a model, a person that you can identify with. Try to imagine the most confident person you know. This person can be a family member, a classmate, a celebrity or anyone else. How does this person act, talk and move? Analyzing a person you look up to will give you more clarity and understanding about yourself. Most of all, this step will help you get closer to confidence. When we identify with someone who models confidence, we instantly clarify what it takes to become confident. Clarity is crucial to unshakable confidence.
Picture yourself being that person right now. Get out of your comfort zone.
Again, feelings are the language of the sleeping giant within all of us. How would you feel if you were the person you wanted to become right now? How would you walk, talk, act and interact with others? How would you speak to yourself? Picturing the person you aspire to become will start the process of internal change. Your mind and body will receive the message that you now have a mission and a goal. It is very similar to wanting to buy something specific, never making an effort to buy it and then complaining about not having it. Confidence will never manifest if you never put yourself in the shoes of your future confident self. It may feel weird and uncomfortable, but that’s the price to pay in order to develop unshakable confidence. Start by doing this exercise with your eyes closed; feel the confidence and keep picturing your future self in your mind. Then let your body manifest it through your actions.
The more you practice something, the better you become at it. The fastest way to learn a new behaviour is to practice it.
When an actor plays a role, we instantly believe in the character he is playing. Why? Because he has transformed into that character. If you want to truly become confident, you need to start acting, to start playing the role of a confident person, and you need to do it now. You start by talking, interacting and moving like a confident person and keep training yourself every day. Many will say, “It feels fake to act like a confident person; it is not who I am,” which is true in a way, but these people do not realize that they have played the character of a person lacking confidence for so long that they have fallen into the comfort zone trap. Lack of confidence is now their default behaviour, so the day they start acting confident, they feel “fake.” In reality, by playing the confident role long enough, you will become a master at it. In no time, lack of confidence will feel fake, while confidence becomes part of your natural behaviour.
Speak to yourself in the language that motivates you. You have nothing to lose.
Break of your comfort zone by making a decision. Decide that from today onward, you will practice the art of confidence, Start acting out the role of the future you. Picture everything, write the script and begin playing your life’s movie. Take risks to play the role of a character who fears nothing. Remember that your past does not equal your future. Use your past as motivation to create a better future, be resourceful and control your destiny. Know that your past doesn’t equal your future unless you live there.
Do the things the less confident you is scared to do, but do them as the character you are playing until you become unconsciously skilled at being confident. People who are comfortable being confident are not any better than you are; they have just believed in themselves and practiced long enough for confidence to become an unconscious behaviour. Now they are naturally confident and naturally successful — not because they are smarter than you are, but because they have worked long enough on themselves.
Now that you know the tricks, the ball is in your court.